Books to Help Talk About Death and Heaven with Young Children
My three-year-old triplet son died in 2016. And it immediately became clear to me that I had no idea how to talk about death to his siblings. What could I say that would make it easier for them to understand their brother was not coming home from the hospital this time? What made this time different than all the other times?
When children are this young, it’s important to continue to talk about their loved one and keep them present. Emphasize the memories a child may hold. Keep photos around the home. Share funny or sweet stories about their loved ones. Look at videos if they are available. And openly recognize and honor their emotions and reactions, whatever they may be.
In our household my children were so young when Benjamin died, I’m not sure they have any solid memories of their brother .. other than the videos we continue to watch and the photos we have around the house that have slowly formed into their memories. They know they have a brother and they know they are triplets. And they know that Benjamin is in Heaven with Jesus.
Luckily, many people offered books and gave us books on grief and heaven. My favorites are below. I hope you can find some solace in these beautiful books.
THE NEXT PLACE by Warren Hanson – this is a beautifully-written and beautifully-illustrated book about what comes ‘next’. Where do we go? I LOVE this one. Click here to see the book on Amazon.
THE INVISIBLE STRING by Patrice Karst – This lovely book illustrates the concept that we are all connected by an invisible string. It’s a reassuring and comforting thought and is a reminder that we are still connected to our loved ones who aren’t here any longer. Available on Amazon.
WHEREVER YOU ARE MY LOVE WILL FIND YOU by Nancy Tillman — I LOVE all of Nancy Tillman’s books. They are so heartfelt yet simple and beautifully-illustrated. I especially loved this one and so many passages truly spoke to me after my son’s passing.
THE MEMORY BOX by Joanna Rowland – This heartfelt book is from a young child’s point of view as they are remembering a loved one who is no longer with her. She collects old memories and creates new ones to include in the memory box. Available on Amazon here.
SAD ABOUT SAMMY By Valette Sopp and Tonya Southwick — Sad About Sammy serves as a good guidebook for parents as well as a tool to understanding emotions for your children. It provides tips for parents on how to discuss and questions to ask young kids, and also centers around a metaphor for children to think about death as the transition of a caterpillar to a butterfly. Available on Amazon here.
A HUG FROM HEAVEN by Anna Whiston-Donaldson – this sweet book is a lyrical poem written from the point of view of the loved one who passed away, reminding you that it’s okay to feel sad. Sadness is a natural emotion but reassuring that they will always be around. Available on Amazon here.
GOD GAVE US HEAVEN by Lisa Bergren — This faith-based book is a conversation between a father and son as dad explains to his son what Heaven looks like. And how Heaven is the most beautiful place, unlike anything we’ve ever seen. Available on Amazon here.
These are all wonderful books that helped my children when they lost their brother. They’ll allow you to introduce death in your family, opening the door for important and honest conversations. Good luck to you.
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